IS LOVE REALLY WORTH IT OR IS IT JUST KILLING US GRADUALLY

 

Let’s be honest: we have normalized cheating in Nigeria to a really crazy point. A man cheats, and we say, “It’s in their nature, men are polygamous in nature”. A woman cheats, and people laugh, saying, “It’s just a backup plan, can’t blame her”. Even pastors will tell you to “close your eyes and pray for your marriage” instead of holding the cheating partner accountable.

 

It would have been better if we were only normalizing it but we’ve gotten to the point where we consistently ignore the risks⚠️ (or should I just say the risk involved always skips our minds). Nobody thinks about STI’s. Nobody talks about how cheating is not just about “feelings” but about exposing someone­-someone who has been faithful, loyal, and trusting-to diseases they didn’t sign up for.

 

We are out here making jokes about side chicks 🐥 and side cocks 🐔(if you think this the wrong way wo you need deliverance) while people are being infected with STI’s 😷 in relationships they thought they were safe. And with the way Nigeria is going, do you know what’s worse? Help is getting even harder to access. Look around you-cheating has become a lifestyle

“At least he’s taking care of the family.” “Side chick no be wife.” “At least he always comes back home to me.” “At least she’s discreet.”  See we have gone beyond excusing infidelity; we now celebrate it. We have accepted that everybody belongs to the streets but we have decided not to think about where exactly those streets lead.

 

Read a story online about a woman whose husband was constantly cheating, she was pained initially, but soon got used to it because she didn’t want to end up like her mother- a divorcee. Growing up, she resented her mom for leaving her father because of infidelity. “It was just cheating,” she always thought. “At least he wasn’t hitting her.” So when she got married and saw the signs, she closed her eyes. Well she had two sons to raise and a family to protect plus at the end of the day, he still came back to her that was all that mattered. Until one day Mr. I love you but I just can’t help it came back home looking really sad. He handed her an envelope and at first she thought he probably lost his job. She opened it, it was her husband test result anddddd HIV positive🦠, she got mad and pissed but first she and her two sons had to take the test. Turns out she and one of her two sons were positive. The same man she had defended, excused, and stayed with “for the sake of the kids” had put them in danger.

 

Now, imagine being in this woman’s position, but in a country where access to HIV🦠 treatment is about to become harder. For years, international funding- especially from the U.S. - has subsidized HIV drugs. But now, with Trump cutting HIV/AIDS🦠 funding to Nigeria, that help is disappearing. This might means: no more free drugs, higher drug prices, more untreated cases and a spike in new infections.

 

Nigeria already has one of the highest HIV rates in the world. Now with fewer people able to afford treatment, things are about to get even worse.

Ohh and for those still making excuses for their cheating partners, let this be your wake up call:  staying with an unfaithful partner is not just about “managing the relationship” it’s about risking your life. 

When people say “Cheating is not a big deal” I need you to think

Would you rather be a good partner or be alive for your family or even kids? Would you rather protect that marriage/ relationship or protect your health? 

Love is not meant to be a death sentence. When people say “Men/ women are not perfect” remember HIV and other STI’s do not actually care.

We need to stop making excuses for infidelity. Cheating is not just “men being men” or “women securing the bag” – it’s a public health issue. Call it what it is. Hold people accountable. Stop celebrating what is destroying lives. Your health is your right. Protect it. Speak up. Walk away if you have to. But whatever you do, don’t stay silent!!!